First of July . . . the 4th near here. The celebration of America . . . my country, tis of thee . . . and so on and on. I looked up how many American military men/women have died . . . in all American wars? Well, No one is jumping out there to say exactly . . . one post did say it's 1.1 million. All the American wars? It's horrible . . . but it doesn't sound like a lot . . . a lot. I mean, all the wars that America has been involved in? One site said that the government has stopped posting the list of Middle East conflict casualties. I wonder why? So, it is a lot but I can't find a definite count.
Anyway, I rode the bike over this afternoon to sick boy's house (David) and run it over to the landlord. Took a short trip over to the local grocery to get a few food items . . . and what I was talking about last month, about me riding the bike and all the bad memories pop into my head? Well, it happened again as I was riding . . . but this time, instead of indulging the thoughts I pushed them away and focused on riding the bike, looking at the road, glancing at the trees I passed . . . consciously refusing to not give in "bad" thoughts. It worked . . . for a while. But in the store . . . well, somebody cut in front of me in line and I'd get so angry, so mad. I didn't say or do anything but . . . I pushed it away again . . . and it kept coming back a little stronger. I put my grocery in my backpack, pushed my cart out to the cart rack and this old lady was standing there, saw me coming and said, "
Oh, your cart looks better than the one I've got here . . . would you mind if I used your cart?" And I smiled and I laughed and all the bad just went away.
Tuesday, July o2, 2o19
I'm thinking that living within the moment, one moment at a time is the best way for me. Stay out of the past . . . the future. Stop the time traveling . . . nothing but ghosts in the past, in the future. Life is here right now as I type this "note" to the world . . . and hope that someone hears me, understands. There's an old saying my dad used to tell me . . . "Life is hard . . . and then you die." Probably right. But he left out that park of the hard-life, the biggest part of the hart life is how difficult I make life . . . for myself.
4:30 pm
Just finished women's soccer for the day. America's team won . . . by a point against England. It was barely, though. an English goal was dismissed because of an "offside" penalty . . . which I have never understand offsides in soccer. AND the American goalie saved a penalty shot from being made. You know? I enjoy women's soccer more than the men's soccer. The women's soccer seems to move faster, more energy on the part of the players . . . and not a lot of "fake" injuries going on in woman's soccer.
I'm thinking about this month's Ninja Poetry Project. I've written a lot and I'm not sure what to go with. I had several ready to be printed . . . but the more I looked at them the more I just didn't like the way they came out. And wasn't as in love with my words I wrote as I was when I chose the poems. So, scrap it all and go back to the writing block. {
smiles}
Friday July o5, 2o19
Wow! Quite a few days have passed since the last entry. But a lot, a LOT going on that I got caught up in and just did not get to writing on the blog. Sorry about that. But there were some rather miraculous things going on, I mean, like Bible prophecy stuff. My best friend had been sick for over 2.5 (or more) weeks, and on Tuesday (?) he had a resurrection . . . just like Lazarus of Bethany . . . he rose from the grave! And we went and had coffee . . . during the day . . . which is important because my friend doesn't like to go out during the day. The other miracle . . . he's not a vampire. THEN we went to a movie,
Midsommar, and it was weird-ass movie! And then we went out on the 4th to the Duck Pond to watch the fire works . . . and today . . . we went for coffee and I complained about his driving and he got mad because he doesn't want anyone to say anything negative about his driving, and I got mad because I don't want to die in a fuckin' car accident and . . . everything was back to normal.
Sunday, July o7, 2o19
Oops. Sorry. Missed a couple of days. You know, "things to do! Hahahaha!" I was thinking about a few things. I've been having troubles with Facebook friends and friends I once knew in real life. Some of them saying this things I'm not interested in discussing with them. If I do start a conversation with them, it will just start an argument which is not something I want to do anymore. So, if they are on Facebook, these knights against the dragon's heart . . . I just unfriend them and just never talk to them again. Ah! But what if they start talking to me? What if they just have to know why I'm no longer their "friend?" I might tell them . . . or not. IF that happens, I'll decide then and there what I wish to do. Until next week, dear readers. {
smiles}
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