The Daily {W}rite The Birthday Month Edition May o8, 2o19 wk o2

The Bus Ride Massacre 

I rode the bus yesterday to the Homeland grocery. On the way back, the bus hit a pot hole or something hard enough to almost knock me out of my aisle seat. As I was falling, I reached back and accidently grabbed a man by his . . . KNEE! "Terribly sorry," I said. The man smiled and shook his head in the manner of one trying to say, "It's okay." After that I got to my stop. I grabbed my heavy, metal water bottle and clunked the lady (who was sitting in the sit in front of me) in the head. There was no smile this time, just a scowl as she rubbed her head.  Again, I said, "Terribly sorry." God, sometimes my life is like a Beckett play!

You know the term People Person, don't you?  A person who really knows how to talk, interact with other persons . . . people. A People Person always say the right thing, laughs in the right place at the stupid joke that the Stupid Person is telling him:
SP (Stupid Person)  . . . . because the monkey eat all the peenutses!
PP (People Person) AaahahahaHA! Ho-ho-ho-HA! Heeeeeeeeeeeeehee!

So, I'm sure you know where I'm going with this . . . I am NOT a People Person! I'm a stumble bum around them (see The Bus Ride Massacre above), my tongue can't articulate a simple word or phrase but when I do somehow find some words, a phrase or two to finally say . . . it's always the wrong fucking words . . . phrases.

Thursday, May o9, 2o19

So, David goes out at night to play Pokémon AND get in some exercise . . . walking and playing Pokémon on his phone . . . in the dark . . . what could go wrong? Do you remember the commercial that has an old lady in her house alone and she trips, falls down and says, "I've fallen and I can't get up!" Yep. He missed stepped on a curb and down he went. Now, granted, back in the day, you know, the twenties, the thirties . . . hell . . . IF you fell down, you just got back up and if anyone one was watching you just act as if you meant to do it. But at seventy plus? No, it don't work that way. You fall and, really, you can't get up. At least not right away. Yeah, some suck-ass things happen to you when you get old. Falling down . . . happens a lot.

Tomorrow is Art Walk! Snuck up on David. It creeped up on me too but I didn't say so to David, "Yeah, tomorrow's Art Walk! Everybody knows that."

So, I've been on my own for the last few days and it has been good for me . . . in a way. Two trips to Walmart, yesterday and today, by local transportation . . . the bus. Yeah, I'm feeling better . . however, I'm still feeling a bit like War's song Slippin' into Darkness . . .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=syd3Kc8U68w
Enough for me tonight. {smiles}

Friday, May 1o, 2o19

About fifteen minutes left in today. Tomorrow is closing in on us . . . soon it too will no longer exist . . . as the future . . . it will be today. And
tomorrow, at this same time, today, this today, will be rehearsing its lines for its place in my yesterday memory file.

Went to Art Walk . . . not a great one for me . . . but what's new? I seem to be getting more aggressive with friends and strangers, still finding myself getting mad at people for what they say and do . . . without knowing why they are saying or doing  . . . whatever. The term "taking things wrong" really says it all about my temper. Ready to jump on anybody, friends, strangers, waitresses . . . anyone who I decide is "fucking with me." And though I did, as usual, jump all over my friend and with a waitress that wasn't waiting on us fast enough . . . I learned a bit more about myself . . . about others . . . that might help me recover from my insanity. Picture above. David's Face in a Light Bulb. You see? A light bulb has an idea and all of a sudden David's face shows up! AaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahahahahaHA!

Saturday, May 11, 2o19

Still cold outside. How can I tell if I haven't walked out into it today? By touching the face of the window glass. You see, a window that faces the outside will register the temperature outside the house NOT the temperature of the inside of the house. Aaaah, science. You gotta love it.

I wrote a Mother's Day poem. Already posted it. It would be redundant to post it here, also. I'm not the biggest fan of writing Mother's Day, or for that matter Father's Day, poems. Don't know why . . . but I'm sure there's a real awkward reasons for not doing so . . . hiding away, I suppose, in one of the many boxes in my subconscious storage space . . . somewhere . . . that's what I've been trying to do these last few days before my birthday . . . sorting out all those subconscious thoughts that clutter my  . . . existence. A spring cleaning for the mind . . . and if one exists . . . the soul.

10:27pm

There's that feeling, that sense when I'm sitting in the dark on the computer at 10:27pm  . . . a sad, lonely feeling that just rushes through my body . . . making a metaphysical sound . . . somewhat like car tires speeding across the wet pavement right after a good rain.

Sunday, May 12, 2o19 12:11am
The TV . . . even on anime night on Adult Swim . . . isn't much help against this ghost feeling . . . yes, sometimes I feel like a ghost . . . haunting this body until the day it gives up, this body, breathing in its last breath . . . not staying alive long enough to experience its last exhale upon this plane of existence. Is there another other than this? Do we die and live again somewhere else, occupying some other form? Or is to die just that . . . dead, the absence of consciousness . . . the endless sea . . . the big sleep . . . the end to all that we once enjoyed, once hated, once loved. Death complete and endless.

1:58pm

Today. The sunlight crawls through the plastic slats of the window blinds. I'm blind too. My ears can see, though. The Soundscapes station on the TV (thanks COX) paints lovely pieces of colorful art for my mind. You don't need to see sound to see the mountains, the rivers, the ocean that music creates.

The reunion is coming up fast. Not sure I'm going. Oh, I probably will. At the least, if someone wants to "see me" I'll probably make myself available. But I have my own life. Most of the people who will show up at the reunion  . . . ALL the people except for David who'll show for this "reunion" has nothing to do with my life. Why bother with it? But still . . . there's that part of me that hungers for a little interaction with people . . . even IF that interaction turns out to be negative.

Monday, May 13, 2o19 4:13am

Yeah, tough night getting my eyes to stay closed long enough for me to drift off into unconsciousness. Oh! Yesterday was Mother's Day. I just wanted to show you one of my favorite Mother's Day animations. That's it above. {smiles} Anyway, that's all from me for tonight . . . I mean this morning. I mean, I gotta get to sleep. Will write more later on today. {yawn}

4:26am

SPOILER ALERT

Watched the fifth episode of season eight of the Game of Thrones and was so impressed by it I stayed up late to watch it again. Damn, a brutal example of war and how the innocent get murdered and killed off in the name of the gods of collateral damage. The heroin, the Mother of Dragons, turns out to be as cold-hearted and blood thirsty as her sworn enemy Queen Cersei Lannister. Because now Mama of Dragons is not fighting to free  the people of the Seven Kingdoms, she's out to settle a blood score because the evil queen had Missandei beheaded in public. Yeah, she had a chance to let the innocent people of King's Landing evacuate before she and her dragon laid waste to the entire city. And we the audience got a front row seat to the carnage through the eyes of Arya who gets caught in the city and is trying desperately to get out of the way of the rampaging Mother of Dragons.
For me, everybody who "had it coming" got just what they deserved. Particularly the evil Queen Lannister, who doesn't suffer an "honorable death," but dies unheroically, buried alive in a dragon fire cave-in in the lower levels of the Red Keep along with her brother/lover Jaime Lannister. Or did they die? I mean we saw them hugging each other as the city above came crushing down on them . . . but we never saw the bodies.

RANT TIME!

Okay, so I woke up this morning, turned on Access Hollywood specifically to hear what the response was by viewers and reviewers of last night's Game of Thrones episode . . . and everybody hated it! No, really HATED it. I mean, they were all over it on A.H. and on Facebook. Facebook was downright indignant about them making Daenerys an evil character because . . . well, because, by god, she's a woman and should NOT be portrayed as a monster! The other gripe about the show was that  Cersei's death was too anticlimactic. They wanted more from her death, not just accidently buried alive (allegedly)! No, something more . . . more . . . Personally, I just think all the anti-sentiment towards Game of Thrones is just a bunch of mass hysteria drummed up by a bunch of trolls! So, my answer to all this hogwash is:

REALITY SUCKS, DOESN"T IT!

I got to thinking about WWII. Millions of real people killed, soldiers as well as innocent civilians. And the allies marched together across Europe killing and being killed to get to Germany and stop the mad man, Adolph Hitler. And they finally got there. And when they did? They found Hitler dead, suicide, they say. Well, what a fucking disappointment THAT was! I mean, how anticlimactic! They should do WWII over again, damn it. We need a bigger better ending where the bad guy gets his comeuppance in front of everybody and so we can all feel like WWII was really worth the effort. I hope no one thinks I'm dissing WWII cause I'm not. I am, however, dissing the ignorant "fans" of GOT who get a shot of reality, a glimpse at what war, real war is like and just blow it off, because it wasn't "exiting" enough. {no smiles for you!}

Tuesday, May 14, 2o19
Well, I FEEL better after ranting about the Game of Thrones haters. I just want to write that. I'll wait until later on today to say anything else . . . except . . . nine days until my birthday! {BIG smile}

10:26pm

I really have very little to say today. I mean, I laid it all out in the rant about GOT fans. But they really aren't fans, are they? You don't diss a show that bad if you're are fan. Anyway, not going to say anymore about it. So, nine more days! {smile}